So it’s cutting it fine, given it’s Tuesday and Valentine’s Day is on Sunday. But I was talking with the boys at work and I said I want to get a date for Valentine’s Day.

A movie would be nice.

A dinner.

Hell, just a flirtatious wink may constitute as a date in my opinion!

I don’t even believe in Valentine’s day. Despite that fact I’ve given three Valentines to three boys throughout my life.

I’ve been single for a very long time. Most loves of mine have been unrequited. The other loves have turned out to be idiots (putting it mildly).

So, given that between now and Sunday my opportunities to meet boys will be

1) though work
2) at the gym
3) at a costume party
4) at belly dance
(and I think there’s only one opportunity there that could be even a little promising).

I challenge you, reader, to find me a date for Valentine’s day.

My only requisites is that he must be in Melbourne (live in Melbourne, or travelling through Melbourne on Sunday – we can’t do a Skype date), non smoker, compassionate, and good sense of humour.

Oh, and he has to know that I’m red. Maybe you could recommend him a paint swatch that I compare to. Postbox red, or on a good day, Chippolata. Or take him a pink lady apple.

Tell him about me.

-I am employed full time as an events planner and writer and personal assistant and general provider of workplace fun.

-I have tertiary qualifications, soon to have a Master of Communication.

-I volunteer at a children’s charity.

(The above qualities show I have stability, ambition and drive, and good with young people.)

-I am a great cook.

-I love food.

-If the money wasn’t less than my current salary and the hours weren’t more, I’d consider being a chef.

(This means I am not a fussy eater. He can take me anywhere.)

-I enjoy seeing bands and listening to music.

-I like movies.

-I have come to enjoy exercise, even if it’s just pilates and bellydance.

(The above things we can do together.)

-I am not superficial.

-I am not afraid to take the piss out of myself. Obviously apparent through merely putting this call out!

-I am broad-minded and have a good sense of perspective.

-I enjoy helping people.

-I have a strong opposition to bullying, discrimination and exclusion.

-And I am happy with my looks, have an alright figure and great smile.

See the following examples.

This is me eating Vietnamese. Dressed well. Smiling.

This is an example of my smile.

I look great in black and white. But the lucky boy will get to see me in full colour.

I won this dress. It makes me look tall. And enhances my assets.

So, my challenge is for you to spread the word, and find me a date for Valentine’s Day.

I’m open to your suggestions.

Thank you!

EDIT: I forgot ONE IMPORTANT THING! I was almost a supermodel. Last year when I entered Fox Fm’s Real Beauty contest. Yep. Almost a supermodel, boys.