Carly Findlay

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This is love.

December 27, 2013 Carly Findlay 23 Comments

This boy, he told me he can’t love me any more because his heart is too full with his love for me. My heart melts. 



(I have been so reluctant to make a photo of him and I public, especially with this recent (cough) internet fame, but he’s given me permission to do so.)

I’m not an inconvenience to him – or rather, my skin isn’t an inconvenience to him. There’s no brushing off my skin from his clothes or wiping the paraffin from his face after I kiss him. I keep saying I will buy him some blotting paper for his face, he said why bother when he will only kiss me again and get oily again. 

I believed there was a high chance that I’d live my life single, alone forever. Finding love when you look different is hard. I’m not playing the victim, but I believe it’s a huge barrier – and you have to prove yourself so much more than those who don’t have visible differences. The amount of times I’ve got my hopes up and have been disappointed are too many to count. I’ve never looked normal enough for someone. 

And just when I wasn’t looking for or expecting love, I found him. How wonderful it is to love him. He is my gift of love, source of laughter and cure for my skin hunger. His razor is on my bathroom sink and I feel like I’m in a real relationship. Now I’m planning a future with him. 

Love is him finding skin in his pockets and smiling because the flakes are portable memories of me.

Love is a morning kiss when my face is unwashed and hair all fuzzy – when I feel my least beautiful. He says I’m beautiful all the time.

Love is switching to sensitive skin products that I can use, in case he hurts my skin when he holds me.

Love is involving himself in my community, planning to attend a dermatology appointment with me, and asking questions about my skin out of genuine curiosity and compassion.

Love is holding my hand to stop me scratching at night, and appreciating – not complaining – that my stupid unregulated body temperature means I’m a heavy duty heater in bed. 

Love is wanting to look after me when I’m sore, even when I am well practiced in looking after myself alone after all these years. 

Love is his big heart, beaming smile and warm arms, waiting for me at the end of the day. 

To those people with Ichthyosis or other visible differences and disabilities: I can’t say you will find love like I have. But there is hope. There are people who won’t look past, but embrace your differences. They’ll love you for everything – even the skin you exuviate. I look at others with Ichthyosis who have found love with sheer joy, knowing that they’re lucky ones too. 

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Related

ichthyosis, ichthyosis awareness, love, romance, Uncategorized

Comments

  1. Adam Morrow says

    December 27, 2013 at 7:58 pm

    Thank you for such a lovely post Carly, i cried when i read this, it really hit my heart. Thank you.

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  2. Averil says

    December 27, 2013 at 8:11 pm

    It's so beautiful to read these posts about you finding love. So happy for you both.

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  3. Anonymous says

    December 27, 2013 at 8:24 pm

    I love reading this! Everyone deserves love and friendship like this. Have a great 2014!

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  4. BUSH BABE says

    December 27, 2013 at 8:24 pm

    And my heart just melted too… you savour every part of it. I still do.
    ♥

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  5. Faux Fuchsia says

    December 27, 2013 at 9:39 pm

    everyone deserves to be loved and to give love, so happy for you Carly xx

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  6. Jenny says

    December 27, 2013 at 11:02 pm

    A lovely post. Blessings to you both xx

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  7. Pip Macdonald says

    December 27, 2013 at 11:02 pm

    Hey Carly, absolutely wrapped for you and Adam. As I've constantly said. It's about the chemistry xx

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  8. Friday says

    December 28, 2013 at 5:02 am

    You guys make me believe in true love.

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  9. Friday says

    December 28, 2013 at 5:02 am

    You guys make me believe in true love xo

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  10. Jo Lord says

    December 28, 2013 at 5:02 am

    A wonderful man who obviously deserves a beautiful woman like you Carly. My heart beams with happiness for you both. My very best wishes for your future together. Love Jo ps next time you're visiting your folks and I'm in the country, I would love to meet you. Xo

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  11. Rach aka stinkb0mb says

    December 28, 2013 at 5:02 am

    Just gorgeous Carly! Everybody deserves to loved and be loved and I'm glad you've found someone who allows you to do and feel that in return xo

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  12. Anonymous says

    December 28, 2013 at 5:02 am

    The thought of your happiness makes me smile all over 😀

    Roni

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  13. Iliska Dreams says

    December 28, 2013 at 11:41 am

    This bought tears to my eyes. ps I know the perfect wedding photographer for you! 🙂

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  14. Ms Jelena says

    December 28, 2013 at 1:48 pm

    So happy for you, Carly 🙂 I don't comment often, but I always read your posts! xx

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  15. DreamBig LiveFull says

    December 28, 2013 at 3:16 pm

    What a beautiful post straight from the heart. Xx

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  16. Anonymous says

    December 28, 2013 at 6:57 pm

    Love this post <3

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  17. Anonymous says

    December 29, 2013 at 12:52 pm

    Yeah very happy for you both

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  18. Adam Morrow says

    December 29, 2013 at 4:11 pm

    That was such a lovely post, thank you for those nice words. I still cry when i read this, it picks me up when i need it

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  19. Sam Stone says

    December 29, 2013 at 9:18 pm

    So beautiful Carly. I am so happy for both of you. xo

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  20. look see. by naomi fenton says

    December 29, 2013 at 9:18 pm

    So chuffed for you Carly xx

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  21. Tat says

    December 30, 2013 at 10:33 am

    Beautiful post, wishing you all the best and lots more love to come!

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  22. West Family Updates says

    December 31, 2013 at 3:49 pm

    Beautiful.

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  23. willywagtail says

    January 8, 2014 at 7:03 am

    So happy for you Carly. I think you have found a good man. Cherrie

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The material on Tune into Radio Carly is copyright. The writing in this blog is by Carly Findlay unless otherwise stated. Most photos in this blog are by Carly Findlay unless otherwise stated. Please do not reproduce without permission from Carly Findlay. This blog represents my personal opinions and experiences. It does not reflect those of my employers'. The information I provide about ichthyosis is mostly based on personal experiences. Please seek medical advice or counseling before trying any new treatments I've written about. Where stared, I use affiliate links on this blog. By clicking them, I receive a small percentage of the purchase.

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