Carly Findlay

Writer, speaker, appearance activist. Loving life!

  • About me
  • Say Hello – my book
  • Hire me!
  • Support Me
  • Contact
  • What is Ichthyosis?
  • Ichthyosis + appearance diversity resources
  • Disclaimer
  • Shop
  • Guest post contribution guidelines
  • Growing Up Disabled in Australia

10 pieces of advice for moving in with your partner

March 31, 2015 Carly Findlay Leave a Comment

Adam and I had lunch with a couple of our friends on the March long weekend. They are adorably in love and will be moving in together soon. One friend, like me, has lived alone for a while. She asked us if there’s any advice we’d have for moving in with her partner. And we did!

It’s almost a year since Adam moved in with me, and to be honest, we’re still adjusting. It is so wonderful to have someone to come home to every day, but housework has been a sticking point. He’s had to get used to my skin (he’s done incredibly well – even converting to low allergy products, and knowing when I need a Phenergan because I can’t stop scratching), and I’ve had to get used to his music tastes (NOTHING like mine) and blokey TV choices (car shows and Mythbusters).

It was our one year anniversary of getting engaged on Wednesday, so this post is so timely!

1) Make sure you can get a water tank that gives you enough hot water, or coordinate so no one has a cold shower. My water tank is really small, so we have to leave at least 30 minutes between showers. For a long time Adam was braving a partially cold shower. But when I had a shower 15 minutes after him one day, I asked why the water went cold and he let it slip that this happens to him too if I have the first shower (and I have a long, hot one!). In the week, he gets up at 6.00 am and I shower at 7.00 am and this gives us plenty of hot water each.

2( Draw up a roster for housework. It doesn’t have to be formal – it can just be a routine that if one of you cooks, the other does the dishes.

3) Do chores straight away (and together to halve the time). I admit I’m not so great at this – especially folding washing – but I have learnt that if I do this straight away, it gives me more time to do the things I want to do without feeling guilty.

4) Split the money stuff in the way you can afford it. Adam and I split the bills and rent 50/50, but sometimes he buys more groceries than me, and I buy dinners out (or vice versa), and I know that if the time came to move, I’d be ok covering most of the rent if he covers bills.

5) Start a savings fund for the two of you. You could choose to pool all of your money (which we haven’t), but I do suggest you start joint savings fund. We are saving for a wedding and a honeymoon and so we opened up a high interest account (I wish we’d set this up earlier!), but you might like to save for a holiday or a house or emergencies. We will continue to save after the wedding too.

5) Cook together. Because food is love. I love cooking with Adam – making pizzas on a Saturday night is one of my favourite things to do. It is fun, we’ve learnt new skills (he’s great at making the dough!) and then we have a yummy home cooked meal.

7) Have screen-free time. Adam will tell you I spend WAY too much time in front of the screen. But turning off the screen allows time for talking, laughing and togetherness. And hugs are better when you’re looking at each other not looking at Facebook. Maybe I should follow Smaggle’s lead of 9.00 pmscreen-free time.

8) Go on a date once a week/fortnight/whatever you can afford. Our dates usually involve food, mostly brunch and dumplings. But we’ve recently been to Cirque Du Soleil and Thriller.

9) Keep the romance alive. I wear pyjamas almost all the time when I am home (what of it? I like being comfortable!) and Adam’s seen me pull my stocking from my bloody, weepy leg and stick cotton buds up my nose. So there are no secrets. But it’s nice to keep the romance going like when we first met. I write him cards and make sure I dress up when I go out. He fixes things, and that is very romantic and useful!

10) Make time to be alone for a few hours each week. I love it when Adam goes to cubs because it means I can spend time writing, playing music and enjoying my own company. And he loves it because he gets to be a leader and do fun, outdoorsy things.

That’s all Adam and I can think of. Got any tips?

Share this:

  • Click to print (Opens in new window)
  • Click to email this to a friend (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)

Related

love, Uncategorized

Comments

  1. cilosophy says

    April 1, 2015 at 2:31 am

    all of these are great and I agree x

    Log in to Reply
  2. Cheryl @blissandmayhem says

    April 1, 2015 at 2:31 am

    What a great post Carly! Practical and also insightful. The savings account and showers I think are great tips and also doing chores together. Share the load. Means more time together for other stuff. oxox

    Log in to Reply
  3. Rebecca Senyard says

    April 1, 2015 at 6:26 am

    Great tips Carly. I didn't live with Jacob till we got married but we still had to face the same tips. We joined our finances together being married. We have separate accounts for bills and savings.

    Log in to Reply
  4. Trudie says

    April 1, 2015 at 10:24 am

    Gosh hubby and I have been together 20 years this year and living together 18 of those years. I don't have tips to add but I do agree about the cooking. It's always been fun to try a new recipe and shop for the ingredients together and make a thing of cooking together having a drink and listening to music. Good times.

    Log in to Reply
  5. Cate Lawrence says

    April 1, 2015 at 10:25 am

    great post, I am also a proud pyjama wearing as much as my husband would prefer me to sleep sans pyjamas!

    Log in to Reply
  6. Bec says

    April 2, 2015 at 6:48 am

    All such great tips Carly!!!! I have been living with my man for the past year and I 100% agree!

    Log in to Reply
  7. Kat says

    April 4, 2015 at 5:45 am

    http://www.chorewars.com/ is good for dividing chores. Everyone loves a bit of friendly competition 😉

    Log in to Reply
  8. Laura says

    April 4, 2015 at 7:14 am

    This is a great post, Carly! Rowan and I have lived together for five years now and we still get stuck on the house work sometimes! But there are so many great things about living together it doesn't matter. I also agree that alone time, or time doing your own thing is really important. Thanks for sharing your tips. 🙂

    Log in to Reply
  9. Olivia says

    April 27, 2015 at 9:28 pm

    Well, I must admit you're right! Since I've moved with my boyfriend a lot of things change – we cook together a lot more, do shopping, clean, etc. I just love when we do it together! Greetings!

    Log in to Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Socials

  • View tune.into.radio.carly’s profile on Facebook
  • View @carlyfindlay’s profile on Twitter
  • View carlyfindlay’s profile on Instagram
  • View sqoggle’s profile on YouTube

Book me to speak

Sign up for some love in your inbox

Listen to my podcast

Tune in

Enter your email address to receive new posts by email.

Archives

Popular Posts

  • What's with the image descriptions on my social media posts?
  • Face Equality Week - My Best Selfies
  • Creamoata: a much loved, yet lost food of my childhood. Help me find it.
  • Face Equality is a Human Right
  • Ichthyosis Awareness Month - The Girl Behind the Face: "Life’s rarely been split between either laughter or tears; both have existed simultaneously."
  • Reflections on turning 40
  • Ichthyosis Awareness Month: Nutritional advice from a dietician.
  • The Greatest Showman - upliftspirational exploitation and the able gaze
  • On AllySHIT
  • Interview with Beth Bradfield from Malory Towers

Copyright

The material on Tune into Radio Carly is copyright. The writing in this blog is by Carly Findlay unless otherwise stated. Most photos in this blog are by Carly Findlay unless otherwise stated. Please do not reproduce without permission from Carly Findlay. This blog represents my personal opinions and experiences. It does not reflect those of my employers'. The information I provide about ichthyosis is mostly based on personal experiences. Please seek medical advice or counseling before trying any new treatments I've written about. Where stared, I use affiliate links on this blog. By clicking them, I receive a small percentage of the purchase.

Copyright © 2022 · Daily Dish Pro Theme on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in

loading Cancel
Post was not sent - check your email addresses!
Email check failed, please try again
Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email.