Oh, I had set out to write something completely different. What I meant to say was:
I have spent a long time thinking about the “look” of cancer. Not surprising given I’m an appearance activist.
I feel really lucky that I wasn’t sad or self conscious when I lost my hair. I had my whole life of looking different thanks to a facial difference caused by a skin condition to prepare me for baldness. I loved my bald head. And I love how my hair is growing back now.
The way people with cancer are portrayed in movies and on TV – even present day – is quite different to how I saw it. Most people I saw at the hospital didn’t look as though they had cancer. And I’m aware of how naive that sounds, given I’m also a disability advocate, fighting for disabled people to be seen – visible or invisible disability. What I mean is, the experience and presentation cancer and its treatments seem so unique to everyone. Not everyone undergoing loses their hair. I didn’t have many of the symptoms I was warned about, but my peers did. I have friends who have become cancer free following chemotherapy and/or radiotherapy, and I have friends who will have cancer forever.
I don’t know if I am articulating that well. But someone said to me when I was going through chemo “you don’t look sick” – which is true, but also not the compliment they thought they were giving.
Cancer, like many disability and chronic illness diagnoses, doesn’t have a specific look. It’s unique to everyone – which is the theme of World Cancer Day, today. United in uniqueness.
Images: 1. Carly with no hair wearing a purple dress. 2. Carly with hair growing back, wearing a colourful dress.
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