Face Equality Week 2026 – what to say to people who ask about your facial difference

It’s Face Equality Week and this year’s theme is Seen and Served – making sure people with facial differences are seen, served, respected and safe in retail and hospitality settings. All week I’ve been talking about what retail and hospo staff can do. But this post is about what people with facial differences can say and do if a retail or hospo worker (or anyone) asks about or comments on their face .

The cumulative impact of being asked about my facial difference, or offered unsolicited advice, can be exhausting. Curiosity can turn into entitlement.

I’m often asked more than once a day about my face. Am I sunburnt? What did I do to myself? What happened? Or I navigate stares, laughter, pointing and fear.

And it can interrupt my day – I just want to do my shopping or enjoy a meal with Adam.

When managing these types of reactions to my face, there’s a pressure to be polite and see these reactions as a teachable moment.

If I then write about these interactions online, I sometimes encounter devil’s advocates, justifying why this happened; or I am disbelieved.

But I don’t owe anyone an explanation, or politeness, or even making them feel comfortable about my facial difference. Certainly not if they’re rude about it. And nor do you.

If you have a facial difference (or disability), and you endure these situations too, here’s what you can say when someone asks about your facial difference or your disability:

“I was born like this.”

“I was injured or disfigured in an accident.”

“I don’t need to tell you why I look like this.”

“What’s wrong with your face?”

“Please stop staring at me.”

“That question is very rude.”

“Don’t you say hello before asking such a personal question?”

“I just want to buy my groceries/eat lunch.”

“I’d rather not shop/eat here because of how you’ve spoken to me.”

“Can I speak to the manager?”

“Your job as retail and hospitality staff is to serve us in a store, not to know my diagnosis, medical history or offer unwanted advice.”

Silence and walking away is also acceptable.

Check out the Face Equality International website for great resources about how to engage with people with facial differences, and sign the Seen and Served pledge:

Images: 1. A close up of Carly’s face – she’s a woman with red skin and short dark curly hair, she’s wearing a bright pink velvet dress, a floral brooch and a pink beaded necklace. She’s smiling. 2. A full length photo of Carly – she’s a woman with red skin and short dark curly hair, she’s wearing a bright pink velvet dress, a floral brooch and a pink beaded necklace. She’s smiling. One sleeve is pulled up over her pink top, because she’s silly!